Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Sex and the Real Life City


Sometimes my life is too much like a Sex in the City episode even for my own good. Pull up a chair and order your eggs, ladies because here is the dish. It's a little story that goes something like this:

There once was a beautiful blogger. We’ll call her…Fabby. Who penned a fantastical blog, named….Lemongloss Peaks. Who met a man. We’ll call him…Aviators. And trotted off arm in arm.

Then one day there was a knock at the door and there stood Aviators with a bag full of every gift Fabby had given him. Including a tin full of yesterday’s birthday cupcakes (homemade devils food with hand-piped homemade vanilla butter cream frosting, of course), seemingly untouched. She should have just stopped him right there and saved herself the 30 minutes, but so is life. How does it go again, oh right…"it’s not you, it’s me." “I have a big career move that needs all my attention.” Aviators was nice enough about it, but let’s not sugarcoat things-dumped is dumped like yesterday’s trash.

Fabby did what any girl would and called her best girlfriend, Fab-Friendy, who high tailed it over with the nearest bottle of wine. You all know the next part….hugs exchanged; confidence boosting compliments about how fantastic you really are even if you feel like a squashed bug; and a rehashing of the events of the last hour. "Really, he had to bring the cupcakes back, how lame!"

The next day Fabby puts on her favorite pencil skirt, killer heels and trots herself off to her newly promoted job (Maybe there is some truth to that curse of 3’s) to kick ass in every way she knows how to at work.

Here’s where it gets good….

Ding goes the inbox and up pops a message from Aviators. Ladies, beware and learn from this: Apparently, as it turns out-in the Fab-Friendy commotion of hugs and wine and a recounting of the story, Fabby’s phone dials up Aviators—as in pocket dials totally by accident. The email from Aviators goes something like this: “Your phone called me just as Fab-Friendy was coming in the door last night and well…I heard your entire conversation.” Yes, that’s right. The 1 conversation between girlfriends that is never supposed to leave the room. He heard it...all of it, loud and clear through the phone. Nothing like a big bowl of hilariousness and humiliation for dinner.

But what kind of episode would this be if the credits rolled now...

Nothing boosts an awful day like a spin around your neighborhood Tar-jay. Snatching up some stylish bargains and feeling good, Fabby drops off Fab-Friendy and makes her way home. Pulling up to the corner, windows down-fresh air blowing and….wait….that looks like….Is that?....yes I think it is….there is Aviators standing on that very street corner, arm in arm with a tall, leggy, blond.

Right…it’s your career…..you need to focus…if only the timing was different. I certainly see how ALL of those things go with dating leggy blonds the very next night. Tacky-- since we’re not sugarcoating things. Read here for the life lesson: Just tell the truth, you’ll be a better person for not sacrificing the other person's feelings to spare your own.

Ok, so there are many life lessons here actually:
  • Fab Friends are life’s saving grace.
  • Make sure your killer, confidence boosting clothes are freshly dry cleaned at all times-You never know when you’ll need them.
  • No one can make you feel inferior without your permission (thanks E. Roosevelt, we all need to remember that one).
  • Happiness is a choice that you can make everyday.
  • ALWAYS LOCK YOUR PHONE!

:Cue sweeping NY city shots and 4 impeccably dressed friends blasting out the doors of that café to take on the world:

No wonder these ladies always drink at breakfast!

11 comments:

  1. The pocket dial? That's the kind of stuff you can't make up. So sorry.

    In other news, what did you do with all of those homemade cupcakes? It's not even 9am and I'm hungry for one!

    ReplyDelete
  2. O
    M
    G
    FOR REALS?! This just proves what a small city Washington really is. What a douche, so sorry you had to go through all this but glad you can get some lessons learned!

    ReplyDelete
  3. What sort of jerk actually listens to a phone call like that, then emails someone to let them know about it?

    Bleck.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Gurl. You have more class in your little finger than that guy will ever even have in his dreams. Keep your head high and your Manolos on. {{hugs}}

    ReplyDelete
  5. omFg! I see the pocket dial as a blessing in disguise. Dude needs to learn how his behavior affects other people. Cupcakes aside, in this case, a post-it might have been preferred over a face-to-face bag o' lies. Good riddance!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Whoa. This is probably one of my favorite posts of yours. I think it's pretty inspirational that you decided to make lemonade.

    That shmuck is terrible, and you're so much better off without him. Plus, I fear that he had possibly kept you away from blogging. Maybe?

    The way I see it, we win. :) Hang in there.

    ReplyDelete
  7. You are SO right about happiness being a choice.

    And from now on, save the cupcakes for your Fab Friends. Until a guy has proved himself worthy, birthday treats merit far less effort!

    ReplyDelete
  8. He was right. It's not you ... it's him. He's a jerk and you're way too classy for him.

    I know it hurts ... but you'll recover and be stronger for it .. all the better to appreciate the real thing when it comes along!!

    Love you kiddo. Hang in there!!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Wow, you all are the best little confidence boost ever!

    I'm making a HUGE batch of cupcakes for all my friends this weekend for sure!

    ReplyDelete
  10. http://imgur.com/gallery/TDvFx

    ReplyDelete
  11. I love the show. I watch it with my girlfriend all the time.

    -Zane of ontario honey

    ReplyDelete